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Add as Friendfunny definitions and quotes ppt

by: dheeralikhi

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1 : School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.
2 : Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich. 
3 : Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills. 
4 : Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters. 
5 : Divorce: Future tense of Marriage.
6 : Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower. 
7 : Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either" 
8 : Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present. 
9 : Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece. 
10 : Dictionary: A place where success comes before work. 
11 : Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on. 
12 : Father: A banker provided by nature. 
13 : Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught. 
14 : Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early. 
15 : Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after. 
16 : Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.
17 : Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.
18 : Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight. 
19 : Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
20 : Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth. 
21 : Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do. 
22 : Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together. 
23 : Experience: The name men give to their mistakes. 
24 : Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions. 
25 : Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death
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